Move on or become friends with her?

DATING ADVICE FORUM

Move on or become friends with her?

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  • Hayley Matthews Hayley Matthews
    DatingAdvice.com
    December 12, 2019 at 1:16 am FORUM ANNOUNCEMENT

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    Rey Hysterio
    Rey Hysterio
    Participant
    October 2, 2019 at 10:34 am #215766
    Move on or become friends with her?

    Recently, when my crush found out that I like her she came up to me and asked if I really did, to which I admitted I do. She responded that she appreciates that I like her but she doesnt feel the same way, and that shes movin back to her country in 3 months and that she wants us to be friends (keep in mind I wasnt her friend before rejection). I didnt talk much during the rejection, coz she seemed nervous so I just stayed calm and listened for the most part since I like her alot. Recently I also found out that she told all of her friends that I’ve a crush on her.
    Despite rejection I still like her alot. Part of me wants to move on and not bother with her, another part of me wants to be close friends with her so she can reciprocate the feelings. At the same time I fear being friendzoned and taken advantage of for my feelings. I’m confused, what should I do? Should I move on or become friends to try to win her over? Any chance of winning her back?

    LiefO
    LiefO
    Participant
    October 11, 2019 at 7:59 am #223262

    Wow! Dude! Change the pattern. Yes, you have a pattern. To paraphrase the military; Don’t Ask! Don’t Tell!
    Do not ask them out, on a date, to a party, for a walk. You don’t realize this but you have lots of time.
    Do not tell them about yourself – you should be a mystery that they might discover.
    I may be the only one who thinks this, but; Women are more cogitative than men. Men are more emotive than women. Whats this you say, Sir! You knew immediately that a particular gal was attractive – based upon an emotional response on your part. Women have to go through an in depth analysis of research and consensus building – that takes time. If she spoke to another female who thinks you smell like her brother or cousin, it may take a long time for her to process out the invalid information from that other female. What are you missing if you go into ‘target lock’?

    Synergia
    Synergia
    Participant
    October 16, 2019 at 8:02 am #223517

    I would move on. Why would you need a girl as a friend? You can’ trust them

    Rey Hysterio
    Rey Hysterio
    Participant
    October 18, 2019 at 12:57 pm #223690

    I guess my mistake was that I was too impulsive and too obvious. I need to be more mysterious next time. But yea, I guess I’ve to move on from this one, tho I dont think that all girls are dishonest, but I am not confident in keeping this crush as a friend after she rejected me.

    Rey Hysterio
    Rey Hysterio
    Participant
    October 29, 2019 at 9:29 am #224213

    Update: I recently apologized for the awkwardness and told her we can be friends.

    ryks1404
    ryks1404
    Participant
    October 30, 2019 at 4:44 pm #224313

    Exactly this.

    Luke Cage
    Luke Cage
    Participant
    October 31, 2019 at 1:12 pm #224442

    Become a friend, nothing wrong with having another friend!

    occuliare
    occuliare
    Participant
    November 2, 2019 at 5:25 pm #224529

    Be friends with her.

    JustAGuy92
    JustAGuy92
    Participant
    November 3, 2019 at 8:17 am #224534

    Try be friends with her, although being friends with someone after being close can be hard , awkward.. all the best

    Jack_P
    Jack_P
    Participant
    November 3, 2019 at 3:44 pm #224539
    Reply To: Move on or become friends with her?

    “…another part of me wants to be close friends with her so she can reciprocate the feelings”. Buddy, if this is what you are aiming to do, you should move forget her and move on. Being friend with a person hoping that he or she might fall in love with you is a bad idea. Because while there is still a chance that it happens, odds are it will never happen, and you will be hurt along the way. It seems to me that you like her too much; you are not ready to be friends with her. Best wishes for everything!